By Larry Leonard
“Yes, the last Ice Age. Enter the first Native Americans, probably. Maybe even these ones, who some say came east across the Bridge to Somewhere before it melted.”
April 03, 2012 — The Inuit people in the villages north of Nome want $50 million taxpayer dollars so they can continue their traditional life style. (It might be $100 million.) Usually, traditional life styles don’t require money. Hunter-gatherers rarely swipe debit cards at the checkout counter.
Al Gore and Oprah Winfrey said so on television, tonight.* It was either NatGeo or the History Channel. No !! It was the Documentary Channel. Wall to wall Socialist video propaganda. This was made around 2003, I think, and is standard progressive fare. The Last Days of Shishmaref is the name of the documentary. The Inuit woman who appeared at the end of this episode of the Vladimir Lenin Docu-hour is concerned that the White Man’s global warming will cause her own future grave to be washed away by the rising waters of the Chukchi Sea. I have been there Here’s the first interesting part about this story.
If the Inuit remain there long enough, they’ll have coconuts in their diet.
There’s oil under the ground in the Arctic. That means that the noble, eternal Eskimo existence in the area has been disturbed before. It wasn’t the White Man’ evil civilization that brought the tear to the Native American’s eye, for one well known scientific reason: Oil is made from equatorial jungle-swamps. Alaska wasn’t located in Alaska at the time. Google the Cambrian Era. Traditional Inuit tribal lands at that time were between the Panama Canal and Brazil’s river of January. Just like the Eskimo kayaks from which I have fished for Arctic Grayling, the entire coastline of Alaska floats. It has to do with tectonic plates drifting on the Earth’s molten mantle, which is by Nature migratory. During the Cambrian age, it was an equatorial swamp infested with six-foot-long centipedes and mosquitoes with three-foot wings.
Shishmaref keeps on the move
As with most things, one of the factors in the story is time. All continents are nomadic. Since the eleventh (my guess — there may have been twice as many ice ages) nature-made, completely normal, totally-disconnected from Man, global warming defrosted the frozen ocean between Russia and Shishmaref, the American Arctic has warmed up to 100 degrees below zero some winters.
Yes, the last Ice Age. Enter the first Native Americans, probably. Maybe even these ones, who some say came east across the Bridge to Somewhere before it melted. If you run into one of them, one of these people, in Alaska, you’ll know it immediately, though the humans in the Documentary Channel video don’t look anything like the noble, original, live-with-nature in natural ways folks. They wear Nikes, or, like me, L.A. Gear. (They don’t cost as much.) And, therein ironically enough, lies the truth.
Go to Shishmaref and see for yourself. It’s north of Nome a ways. My old client, Alaska Airlines, can hook you up with a bush seaplane ride to the place.
These are not Native people, except in blood. They live in houses made of manufactured wood from far, far away, wear clothing you can buy at any outdoor store, shoot seals and caribou with rifles made by Winchester and Remington (and which have nice scopes), ride to the hunt in an old half-ton pickup, on four wheel runabouts like the Arctic Cat, or during the winter, on snowmobiles. They fish the local sea in aluminum boats with gasoline-fueled outboard motors, wash their clothes in the local laundromat, play video games and watch television in their homes — and use radios any modern Ham Radio operator would recognize, to ask their pal 500 miles across the tundra how things are going over there.
Live where you want. Just don’t bill me when a storm blows the roof off.
And, so, from a man who has been there, the truth is that the idiot, Algore and his Princess Opera, as usual are feeding the planet a line of baloney. Ice ages and equatorial heat came and went for a billion years prior to the arrival of humanity on Earth. The process is going on, today, and will continue for approximately 3 billion more years before the sun expands into a Red Giant and boils every drop of water off into space.
The essence here is that Opera Wind-free is telling you to scale down your lifestyle in Hillsboro, Oregon. You own an SUV? You anti-green bastard, you. She’s doing it from her upper West side NYC million dollar apartment. Al “Lurch” Gore flew in on his private jet to join her in the studio for the event.
Only the socialist dupes, the stupid descendants of the stupid Sixties hippies, believe the crap they dished out on this program. Or, there is the possibility that AG and OW actually believe what they’re saying? I would rather that they are liars. I hate to think of people that stupid being allowed to drive a car near the Rockefellers.
It has to do with Igloo roofs, not roots
The gentle, simple Native Americans of Shishmaref talk about getting government money while sitting under a tar paper and shingle roof. The only connection between their “traditional” lives and how they live now is north of their store-bought hunting boots and south of their baseball caps. It is called a “mouth,” and part of what goes in it comes from the body of a seal. Yes, they used an outboard-powered aluminum boat and a rifle with a telescopic sight to shoot the thing, but still and all, it is a seal.
If you are as little as one-sixteenth American Inuit, you can legally eat marine mammals way up there.
And, that, except for the fact that there are no freeways that far north, is the total difference, today, between the people of Shishmaref and anybody you might see shopping at K-Mart in some suburb of Portland, Oregon. Facially, I find them to be handsome. The more native (Cacusus-Asian land bridge) blood they have, the more they look like Chief Crazy Horse.
On the right is one that I put on the tails of Alaska Airlines back in the early Seventies. His name was either Homer or Oscar, if memory that old serves. I’ve never met one I didn’t like, but the very idea that millions of dollars should be spent to subsidize their Field and Stream lifestyle while they’re riding Japanese snowmobiles and huddling inside their fashionable ski-wear is ridiculous. The liberals would have you treat people as modern as these as though they were inhabitants of a Walt Disney theme park.
Subsidies for fictional Man-caused interglacial thermal periods is ridiculous. Spending millions to move lowland Eskimo villages to protect them from natural geological and meteorological processes is insane. If they don’t like their houses falling into the sea, they should construct them where that won’t happen during glacial interstices. (A place called Tin Creek would be a good idea. It’s not far.) You’d think that having got here by way of a bridge made of ice a mile deep, they would have noticed that climate change happened up there years before the SUV was invented. They were there when it happened, for God’s Sake.
And, there’s something politically incorrect about suggesting that a nomadic tribal people find a better place to forage during periods of locally-nasty-but-perfectly-natural climate change?
Out of Africa?
* Program info on the DISH network indicates this documentary was either created or first run around 2003.